Monday, May 28, 2007

Bedside Manners

At the beginning, John spent most of his time at the hospital sleeping. He was on pretty heavy pain medication, plus, he's 86 years old. That's what he does.

On the afternoon of day two, my dad was fast asleep and I was reading a book, when I looked up to find my mother anxiously polishing off the remains of John's mostly untouched lunch. After watching her knock back a cup of room temperature vanilla ice cream like it was a shot of tequila, I asked Trudy whether diabetics are supposed to have ice cream. Ashamed, shook her head no. "So, why are you eating it then?" "I'm nervous... I have a problem."

Just then, a perky blond nurse bounced in to collect John's lunch tray. She called his name, but he didn't respond. She freaked. "John! John!" She put her mouth right next to his ear. "JOHN!" John's eyes popped open. "What?? What??" Perky Nurse sighed. "Geez, John, I thought you were dead!" John sneered and closed his eyes. "Not yet."

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Great website - always enjoy new entries. Thanks for sharing - those of us well versed in the crazy appreciate your humor.